I love writing. Writing soothes my soul.
The following is from a letter I wrote:
“I fought for my family, my mom, my brother, my marriages for 40 years. I fought to save people, tried to fix everything and then I got it…love is not supposed to be a fight, people make it a fight; they manipulate, deceive, control, guilt, punish…but not out of love, they do it because they must be right, they have to control…it will be their way and their way only. But that is not love, that is ego and ego has no place in love
I thought I was fighting for the most amazing love I had ever known, fighting for you fighting for us. Truth is there never should have been a fight…there originally was nothing to fight about or for, it simply was / is but something happened and that originated from you…I was fighting for us but in truth since it originated from you…I did not understand I was actually fighting you.”
Relationships evolve but we are taught in society that if it changes we have to fix it, we have to fight to get something back. It is easy to fall into this trap, because most of us have been raised to believe in “fighting for love”. The truth is when something is off, we are no longer vibrating in harmony with each other. This is not a bad thing it is simply a time to step back and grow.
People are afraid to step back because they might lose everything, yet if you push and push chances are you will lose anyway.
We are constantly evolving, why do we expect everything to stay as it was? We should enjoy the evolution and deepening of relationships. It is out own insecurity that causes us to hold on to the “what was” instead of allowing the flow of love.
It goes back to understanding what you want out of your life and the relationship between you and you. If you are trying to fix love and it is uncomfortable then there is something going on that does not align with your inner being. It is best to step away for a time, be honest with yourself and allow the other to come into their alignment.
You may say, “but what if they find someone else?” and I ask you, “what if they do?” If they find another to satisfy what is going on with them it is not a reflection of you, it is their story and it is your insecurity in your relationship between you and you that causes you to fight for something that is shifting. Be straightforward, tell them that you love them and always will, then go do things that make you happy and satisfied…even if you have to do it alone. This time with yourself will allow you to come back into alignment with your inner being. As you become satisfied with your life, happy with yourself everything will shift. You may find others drawn to you that are in alignment with you and from that a beautiful new relationship blossoms.
This relationship can blossom from new people coming into your life or it can happen from the growth end evolution of old relationships. The key is to let go of expectation of others and find that satisfaction in yourself.
Sounds easy, it should be easy but we are taught it is hard, we are taught to fight.
When you stop fighting you have no opponents.
Love simply is…allowing love to “be”.